And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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