WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
