In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
