i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
