How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Let's get the cat blown out
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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