She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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