He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
