Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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