She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
