at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
