So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
