and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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