: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
