Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize