ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
True college students do jello shots in the library
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