Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
i need to put some appletini on your dick
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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