No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Sext me about skeletons
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life