He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
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No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
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Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!