So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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