so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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