...so i touched it.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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