You smell like stripper and shame
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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