Texts From Last Night

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  (509): View more from Washington

  you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin

  (509): View more from Washington

  and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"

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  (509): you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin (509): and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD" http://tfl.nu/lw4q
  Replies (37) Good night (3681) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+

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  (704): One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+ http://tfl.nu/62eq
  Replies (91) Good night (25030) Bad night (1048)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"

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  (651): I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated" http://tfl.nu/zfhg
  Replies (29) Good night (1565) Bad night (8724)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I forgot about that,good spring break.

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  (703): then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild" (773): I forgot about that,good spring break. http://tfl.nu/09xy
  Replies (16) Good night (6181) Bad night (1278)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source

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  (813): literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source http://tfl.nu/0y8j
  Replies (14) Good night (1008) Bad night (3537)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?

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  (206): Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right? http://tfl.nu/ikqz
  Replies (14) Good night (840) Bad night (5244)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity

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  (717): There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity http://tfl.nu/xz3u
  Replies (6) Good night (1869) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?

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  (610): Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil? http://tfl.nu/j8sh
  Replies (5) Good night (1440) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye

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  (763): Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye http://tfl.nu/6gyi
  Replies (10) Good night (737) Bad night (1031)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed

  (949): View more from California

  Someone's stooooned

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  (714): I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed (949): Someone's stooooned http://tfl.nu/d50z
  Replies (13) Good night (1894) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!

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  (918): It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore! http://tfl.nu/18ia
  Replies (2) Good night (1242) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  . Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.

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  (615): . Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this. http://tfl.nu/oczw
  Replies (6) Good night (1313) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste

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  (425): Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste http://tfl.nu/bd6y
  Replies (5) Good night (1447) Bad night (353)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.

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  (818): I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt. http://tfl.nu/o8z5
  Replies (8) Good night (1000) Bad night (215)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why is there a cash register on top of my car?

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  (215): Why is there a cash register on top of my car? http://tfl.nu/nfm6
  Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (235)

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