Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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