Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
