I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
