I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
