They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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