She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize