i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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