Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(250): View more from British Columbia

Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere

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(601): View more from Mississippi

A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.

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(626): View more from California

Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?

(308): View more from Nebraska

Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(716): View more from New York

I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?

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(703): View more from Virginia

I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.

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(949): View more from California

That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it

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(469): View more from Texas

Where is everybody?

(214): View more from Texas

It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.

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