he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
