So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
