it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
