next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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