We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
