please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
