You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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