I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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