Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize