Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
