if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
