if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
