White coat. Heels.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
