Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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