two words: eviction party
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
you never un-have a 4some
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
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