Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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