If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
