I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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