do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize