At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
She even gives head with a lisp.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
